Lifestyle Article Information

• LIFESTYLE ARTICLE_POSTED_BY: Arjan Bogaers
• LIFESTYLE ARTICLE_POSTED_ON: Nov 21, 2021
• Comments : 1
• Views : 493
• Likes : 1
• Category : Find Internal Balance
• Description :
• Location : https://www.heartandsoul.co.za

Overview

• For many reasons, some of which will be mentioned here, a chronic illness, pain and/or disability can be the cause of deep depression and lonely isolation. These two comorbid conditions are mutually perpetuating and one can get trapped in this cycle. Somewhere this cycle needs to be interrupted and broken through.
  
  Now, illness is usually associated with an acute event. We fall ill and lose normal function when we get the flu, for example, an infection or when we sustain injury. This causes temporary interference and with rest, appropriate therapy and medication the previous healthy state eventually returns.
  
  Chronic illness
  In a chronic condition, however, an every-minute-of-every-day continued disruption is much harder to understand, accept and deal with. 
  
  You did not choose this. You had amazing future plans. You saved up for . . . Your job . . .  What's going to happen?
  
  When we are subject to more information than we can emotionally and mentally 'let in', so to speak, we talk of overwhelm. And in overwhelm, certain safety mechanisms set in. 
  
  Denial
  Denial is a way of 'holding off' a shocking and distressing reality. "This can't be true." "There must be a mistake." "No, no, no, this isn't so serious. Probably age-related, or . . ."  "I'm going for a second opinion!"
  
  Anger
  After some time, however, additional examinations and tests only confirm the initial findings. Things can no longer be denied. "This isn't fair!" "What have I done wrong to deserve this?" "My life is ruined."    Anger is the result of feeling powerless and of feeling that a great injustice has been done. Anger often goes together with feeling a victim.
  
  Bargaining
  Still, our need for hope is as stubborn as our urge for survival. And so we think up markers along the way that could diminish the harsh truth. "Maybe if I ( have that operation, give up free radicals, do that ozone cure, have that . . .). And by all means, we leave no stone unturned to find methods, lifestyle adjustments and interventions that contribute to our general well-being. 
  
  Depression
  However, in spite of all the best efforts, support, costly medical interventions and disciplined behaviour, your condition is a given fact. You may live another five years, you may live another fifty years. But you know that each and every day of those five or fifty years will be marked by the effects of your condition.  Grief enters your life deeper than you could ever imagine, and it feels as if it will last forever.
  
  If grief is a process of healing, then depression is one of the many necessary steps along the way. It is of great importance t understand that this depression is not a sign of mental illness. It is the inevitable and appropriate response to a great loss. Loss of how you thought your future life would be. Loss of a sense of self. Loss of self-reliance. Loss of control. You withdraw from life, left in a fog of intense sadness, wondering, perhaps, if there is any point in going on. 
  
  Depression in response to fundamental loss is often seen as unnatural: a state to be fixed, something to 'snap out' of.  But you really need to grieve your losses. You need to let go of the person you once were. 
  
  When depression is this: the deep inner pain related to your loss and confusion regarding the quality of your future, it is a necessary stage. After all, for your soul to come to terms with shocking change, you need to withdraw from the world where you no longer feel you belong. Lost on the dark waters, you need to reorient yourself, consider another course and slowly adjust your sails. 
  
  But there is a limit here. When the effects of depression make you isolate yourself for long periods of time, neglect your hygiene and your relationships, stop you from eating, stop you from going outside and harbouring thoughts of suicide, then the dynamic has gone beyond what is a healthy necessity. Then your depression has a detrimental effect on your recovery, vitality, motivation and prevents you from moving forward. 
  
  Especially when a condition is progressive and includes the so-called infinite losses, and in the case of chronic pain, depression as serious comorbidity needs to be monitored and attended to. 
  
  It is very understandable and not to be judged when the effects of depression overwhelm you and make you want to give up. But this is also the point at which you may no longer be able to cope with things by yourself. This is the point where you need support in helping you through the bleak, helpless moments and find renewed motivation.
  
  Please note: Heart and Soul is a coaching and counselling practice, not a medical practice. Observations, reflections, suggestions and experiences presented here are not intended as, neither should be interpreted as having medical credibility or being a substitute for medical attention. If you suffer from health issues, please use your primary health care provider as your first port of call.